1.  When I was a kid I used to play circus with my dogs and pretend they were lions that I was taming.  I'd put my hand in their mouths to show how they wouldn't bite me, and they didn't.  Nice dogs!
2.  I like dogs still.  I'm afraid of cats. 
3.  Still.  Even though I'm pushing 30.  I think cats are scary.
4.  Other fears: mirrors, aquariums, and people moving in unnatural ways.
5.  Not little aquariums, not fishtanks.  But the big ones that are a wall full or (oh god) the dome ones you could go into if you were insane?  I hate those.
6.  "Unnatural movement" meaning how people crawl all creepy in horror movies.
7.  I have big teeth.  But they're very straight because I had braces as a kid.
8.  I'm vegan.
9.  I brush my teeth with fennel toothpaste.  I LOVE fennel, anise, and black licorice.
10.  I don't really understand pranks.  I think they're funny, but when I try to come up with my own, they're incredibly lame.  
11.  My worst "prank" was writing a love letter from a shed to a house.  Pathetic.
12.  I called in to Loveline one time to ask if anal bleaching was real or not, and forgot to make it clear that I wasn't wanting to bleach my own butt, I'd just read that Laura Flynn Boyle bleaches hers and couldn't believe it.
13.  For the record, I have never bleached my own or anyone else's butt.
14.  But if you paid me I would bleach yours.
15.  I see butts all day at work.  I'm used to it now.
16.  I was briefly a drama geek in high school.
17.  Briefly was plenty for drama geekery.  
18.  I also joined the track team and then refused to run in a single meet because I was too nervous about people watching me.  
19.  I did that for two years.  My coach gave up on me 1.5 years in, which I think shows remarkable patience on his part.
20.  When I was 4, my dream job was to work at Dairy Queen.
21.  I called my paternal grandparents "Mam-Maw and Pap-Paw" because they're from West Virginia and that's what you do there.
22.  Both Mam-Maw and Pap-Paw have passed away, but I loved them tons and tons and I miss them.  They were a blast.
23.  In college, I didn't join any clubs or anything.  But I had a good time anyway.
24.  I taught Mr. Polly what a dutch oven is.  The hard way.
25.  On our honeymoon, we went to Las Vegas and to Zion National Park.
26.  Immediately following our wedding, I freaked out because I was A Wife and was worried that I had to start acting differently.
27.  I never started acting like A Wife, really.  I mean, I cook and clean but I also still do all the weird stupid stuff I've always loved to do.
28.  When I was a nanny, I let the kids go fishing using gummy worms as bait.
29.  When I was a nanny, I made a lot more money than I do now.
30.  I have a mean right hook.  I've knocked grown men right off their feet with it.  But I don't do that anymore.  I would if I were getting mugged or something, but not for fun anymore.  Because I'm mature now.
 
 
That was cute.
ReplyDeleteSure you don't bleach your butt. I believe you. :p
haha. I think I love you even more PollyAnna..as if that were possible.
ReplyDeleteAnd I totally get the unnatural movement thing. Holy hell. That guy in the movie *Legion*, you know the ice cream truck driver with the super long arms and legs that crawled on all fours? Sweear to God, nightmares for weeks after seeing that. :::shudder:::